


Moving Out

by imasleepytea



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Soft Boys, Trans Simon Snow, Trauma, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Is Gay for Simon Snow, im sorry, simon is doing better, this is so bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:22:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25728124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imasleepytea/pseuds/imasleepytea
Summary: Inspired by a post I read about the fear of letting go of your past trauma in recovery. Simon is getting over stuff but he can't quite give up the label of his trauma. Also Simon is trans because that's what I need.
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	Moving Out

Simon has been working hard in therapy since they came back from America and sorted out the Watford Incident. He's slowly getting to a place where he can reach out to Baz without really thinking about it and where Baz's touch doesn't make his chest feel so tight he thinks he's dying. 

Some days he makes it out without crying once and he's pretty much always dressed by ten am. But, as much as he hates feeling so broken, there's a part of him that just can't let go if it. The brokenness is a blanket he's wrapped around his shoulders so he can carry it with him always. There are days when he catches himself laughing, really laughing, or smiling at nothing when he looks in the mirror and he has to stop himself. Because he is broken and broken boys who don't identify with their bodies can never be happy. 

He knows that the steps he's making; his therapy, his meds and his hormones are a movement towards being happy, are a sign that he wants to be and that others believe he can and should be happy. 

He tells Baz one night that he's scared to be anything but broken, that broken feels like home to him; the snail's shell he crawls back into when it gets too much. Baz is gently stroking his spine when he says this, but pauses for a moment, palm pressed into the small of his back. "Honey even the most abusive of houses can feel like home. maybe its time i started to help you move out."


End file.
